Amazing Grace That Saved a Broken, Rejected, Lost, and Depressed me!
Born into a dysfunctional home, life for Grace (then Hyacinth) was far from being normal. As she was faced with many challenges and often witnessed her mother being physically and verbally abused by her adopted father. At the age of 10 years old, her mother left her dad to start life on her own as a single mother of six. Her mother later found salvation, but that was short lived as she backslid after the death of her mother and much challenges.
Grace, being the fourth child never felt loved by her older siblings and mothers' family members. Growing up, she was alienated and regarded as an outsider. Every day she was reminded of her dark complexion and told how ugly she was. At the beginning of a young age, she suffered physical, mental, emotional, and sexual abuse starting from four years old until 14 at the hands of a next-door neighbor, older siblings, mothers' sister, stepfather, and two distant cousins. She would later grow up to hate life and often daydream of "flying away" as a way of drowning the pain.
School life for Grace was no better as she bullied and ridiculed for her dark complexion by teachers and peers. Grace recalls having been told by one teacher that her place is to live in a coal yard and by another that he controlled her future with his pen. Grace said she escaped the pain by imaging life as being someone different.
At the age of 12 years old, a next door neighbor asked Graces' mother to allow her to accompany her to an Oral Roberts' evangelistic crusade. After being there for some time, Grace wondered into the crowd alone and was met by a lady who asked her if she wanted to be 'born again.' Something inside told Grace that this was why she was here. And so, she agreed in a prayer of faith for her salvation. Grace remembered that night as if it was yesterday and to this, she said "As I was praying, suddenly I felt that I had lost control of my thoughts and mind. I was saying things that I did not understand, and my body was responding in a way that was new to me. Just then I became afraid of from the thought that came to me saying who will help you with this Christianity? Don't you know that you are going to fail and will disappoint God? Remember, you don't even belong to a church, so who is going to help you?" Grace said she shakes herself and stopped. The lady she said, ask her "why did you stop. Why did you become afraid?" She never gave the lady an answer but, as the years went on that thought and memory never left her. Later on, she would start receiving visions from the Holy Spirit of events to come, although at the time she was not aware of its meaning.
Then one day her mom introduced her to a man who would later become her step-father. Grace had hopes that life for her mother would finally become pleasant and perhaps she too could get a break, which seems so for a while, as she saw her mother being happy for the first time.
Her only love, she said, came from her mother whom she was very much fond of and saw her as a role model. So, it was no surprise that one day when her mom caught her making out with a man almost twice her age, that she immediately resorted to suicide as the only answer to the disappointment that she perceives her mom was feeling. That night she decided that the only way to bring comfort to her mother and take away the shame and sorrow that she may have caused was to kill herself. After all, she thought, "life would be much better if she did not exist in this world and maybe she would find peace." But, the Lord had other plans, for that night after confiding in a family friend her plans for suicide, she went up on the roof and swallow an entire bottle of 'unknown' medication. In the morning she realized that she was still alive. Confused, shameful, and uncertain she proceeded to take what may come. Surprisingly, her mother never mentioned the incident ever again.
The pleasant life that Grace thought was going to last forever, slowly became unbearable as she often witnesses the physical abuse that her mother suffered at the hands of her step-father. Then, as if that was not enough, he would sexually abuse her and physically abusive to her younger brothers.
At age 16, Grace would find herself pregnant, and a high school drops out. This new situation forced Grace into two unsuccessful homemade abortions as she was fearful of what her mothers' reaction to this news would be. However, though her mother was disappointed, she remained Graces' strongest supporter and cared for the child as if she was hers. On the other hand, life experiences with her teenage baby father were not easy as she suffered both physical and mental abuse at his hands. All of this pressure led the valuable Grace to attempt her second suicide while pregnant after receiving a severe beating from the child's father for visiting one of her siblings. However, this proved unsuccessful as he quickly rescued her. But their relationship would later come to an abrupt end when her daughter turned two years old. For Grace, this was the beginning of a self-destructive life that spiraled out of control. She became sexually promiscuous and often rebel at life through homosexual and heterosexual activities along with illicit drug use. During this time she continues to encounter many challenges, several near-death experiences, a paid bounty hunter hit at age 21. Nevertheless, Grace held onto the only two people in her life who loved her and whom she loved endlessly, thus giving her considered worthless and useless life meaning.
Three years later she migrated to the United States and despite her out of control life, often homelessness, and lonely life, she managed to send for her daughter to live with her. For she believed in her daughters' future that was revealed to her by God from the child was two and a half years old. Grace can recall the joy of being in America and the hope she had of "becoming someone" one day. But with having no guidance as she was made to engage in the selling and trafficking of illicit drugs by her mothers' oldest daughter and a boyfriend who took her out of the streets. Graces' life continues down a rugged, rough pathway. Then one day she received a phone call that her mother was shot and killed in the streets. After receiving the devastating news, Grace immediately ran into the street and in the pathway of ongoing traffic to silence the pain.
Again, God had other plans and just as she was laying down, her then-boyfriend was coming down the street and while hailing the cars to stop running after her. She overcame this tragedy by turning to God after a couple of Jehovah witnesses came and told her that they were led to her. She slowly regains her strength even though the loss did take a toll on her emotionally, physically, and mentally.
Later, she would get married and started her dream of furthering her education. Grace then graduated with her GED and went on to acquire a Home Health Aide certification, a Certified Nursing Assistant certification while working with the geriatric population of whom Grace felt her calling as a caregiver. She continued from there, despite her abusive marriage, which also resulted in divorce. And led Grace to find herself as a single mother of two and then shortly afterward three children all of whom lived with her. She suffered an almost fatal car accident which left her with a broken right femur, and ankle. Still, Grace did not give up. She would later enroll in college and graduate with a Phi Theta Kappa honor, schools' highest honor, Woman of Distinction award, and top of her class award. One day, Grace received a phone call from an ex -working colleague who invited her to a church that she found. After being told by the colleague that the church was filled with a lot of single men. Grace was extremely excited to attend. But as God would have it, since He could not get Grace to come to Him by no other means, He would ensure that she is never again lost. This partnership would be the first for Grace, as she had never been a member of a church. And this time, to destroy the fear of not having anyone to help her along, God assigned Pastor Alex Mfum of Redemption Christian Center International Church as her shepherd, mentor, spiritual father and guide. Whenever Grace was not in church, Pastor Mfum would call or visit. Sometime later Grace received water baptism.
That same year, Grace met a man outside of the church who would later be the father of her fourth child. While enrolled in college working on her nursing prerequisite courses, she found herself a single mother yet again caring for four children. Towards the end of her nursing program, the father of her last child returned and after graduating the nursing program with a Phi Theta Kappa honor and the schools' honor roll the two got married.
Grace wondered if she would ever get a break from a life that seems to fight her in every direction. But as life would have it, married life did not turn out to be what she had hoped and dreamed. Still, Grace was even more determined to continue and shortly thereof she acquired a Bachelor of Science in Nursing degree. Soon after, Grace enrolled in the Masters' of Science degree in Nursing program with a concentration in nursing education. Meanwhile, her marriage spiral out of control and finally came to a halt after much mental, physical, and verbal abuse and being separated from her husband who left her and the children to live in another state after two years.
Grace life at this point took another turn. This time she was more determined to seek God and all that He had planned for her. And in 2013, during one of her fasting and prayer time, Grace was baptized with the Holy Ghost. The next year, while at a women's retreat, Grace had an encounter with the Holy Spirit and from there the birth of the Women of Grace Club of Worcester ministry emerged. Grace graduated in 2016 with her MSN degree and shortly after was divorced from her husband.
Grace now lives an extraordinary lifestyle entirely for the Lord while pursuing another degree in nursing education. She is actively involved in her church and serves as Church Coordinator, President of the Social Committee, Children and Youth Ministry Director and Teacher. Grace is presently employed as a Nursing Adjunct Professor at one of the city's best colleges. She also works part-time as a Director of Clinical Staff Development in Home Care, a Hospice Case Manager, and a Home Health Nurse. She cares for her three younger children at home and is expecting her first grandchild. Grace describes her life as one that rose out
of "the epitome of poverty," rejection, and the repeated abuse. H, Grace remains contented, exceptional happy, joyful, and fun loving. Grace describes her purpose as one to serve women who are lost and forgotten. She values those who suffered or still is, from abuse and rejection as a result of her own life experiences and not having someone to mentor, inspire, empower, and motivate her through all of lives ups and downs.
Meeting Grace, you would never be able to tell that her life had taken such direction as the only thing you will see is the radiance of God's glory on her life. Many people she says, often think that she had a "golden spoon" in mouth all her life. Grace concluded by saying, "despite the rugged road that I traveled on, I am more than determined to keep living for the Lord, serve others and utterly refuse to let bitterness, self-pity, or even blaming control my life. For it is not me who lives now, but it is Christ Jesus who lives His life on earth in and through me."
"Refuse to let the past determine your future."
Jesus answered and said to her, “Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.”
The woman said to Him, “Sir, give me this water, that I may not thirst, nor come here to draw.” (John 4:13-15).
"Whosoever the Son of God set free they are free indeed."
